Give and Let Give/Transcript
This is an episode transcript for Give and Let Give. Transcript Michelle: More tea, Miss Pretty Pretty? Would you like a cupcake? Kevin: Cupcake! Zidgel: I'm the captain! I should be served before the crew. Are they all gone? Michelle: I'm not sure there are enough to go around. Grandmum's secret recipe, chocolate squid. Kevin: Yum! Gulp. Zidgel: Guess they're all gone now. Michelle: Not quite. There's enough for Midgel, Fidgel, and you. Kevin: One for Jason? Michelle: No, Jason doesn't get any. Kevin: Why not? Zidgel: Uh, you sure? Really, he can have mine. Michelle: I made them. I say who gets them. But Grandmum sent me to my room to think about my behavior. Do you think that's fair? Zidgel: I would never disagree with a grandmum. You should share with your brother. Midgel: Captain, Admiral Strap on the horn. We have a mission. Zidgel: Duty calls. Zidgel: Kevin? The hat? Thank you. Jason: Let me have a cupcake. I'll tell Grandmum you learned your lesson when we get back. Michelle: No. I made them. I say who get's one. Jason: You won't give me one because you're still mad about plazer tag. Michelle: Yeah, it was no fair. I was sick of being it. Jason: At least I shared with you. Michelle: You gave me the broken one. Jason: This one? It's a new invention. Fidgel even said it didn't work right. Michelle: No, thanks, that thing is a plazer tag magnet. Wherever I hid in the room, that beam would find me. I was it the whole time! Jason: Fine, but it's not my fault it doesn't work. Keep your stale old cupcakes. Midgel: Captain, we just received a new directive. It's a class 4 planetary operation. Zidgel: Right, this is the big one. Battle stations, man the main blasters, stand by tracking and targeting systems, raise shields! Fidgel: Uh, sir, class 4 operation. It's intervention between two opposing factions. It's a peacekeeping mission. Zidgel: Right. Okay, so, what's our heading? Fidgel: To the Planet Sharalike, land of the great Shahara Desert. Ooh, look, fortune cookie. Zidgel: What? Sol never gave me a fortune cookie. Fidgel: "The generous souls shall be blessed, and he that waters shall be watered also himself," hmm, interesting. Michelle: What does that mean? Zidgel: Who knows? Midgel: I believe the conflict on Sharalike has something to do with water. Maybe he's talking about that. Fidgel: No, the fortune seems to be talking about sharing, you know, generosity. Jason: Wouldn't know anything about that, would you? Zidgel: Kevin, put that thing away. We have a mission. This is no time for games. Kevin: I likes it. Zidgel: To Planet Sharalike! Michelle: What a lovely planet. Jason: Looks pretty dry to me. Michelle: It's all how you look at it. Jason: I'm looking with my eyes, and it looks pretty dry. Fidgel: Silicon based soil compounds, arid surface climate, 80 degrees, zero humidity, and, ooh, this is interesting. I'm detecting major underground reservoirs. Zidgel: Major who? Fidgel: I'm detecting water, underground. Midgel: What do you think you're doing? Kevin: Looking for water. Fidgel: Wait a minute, I got something. Precisely three point one four degrees east by northeast. Michelle: What is it? Fidgel: Something different. Very different. Come along. Follow me. Zidgel: Sure, east sounds good. Let's go that way. Everyone, stay together. Flam Mingo: Well, hello, and welcome, so nice of you to come. You must be from the Federation. I am Flam, this is my wife, Sham. We are the Mingoes. Thank you for arriving so quickly. Kevin: I likey your hat. Zidgel: It's our job, sir. We received a class 5 planetary request for assistance. Fidgel: Uh, that was a class 4. Zidgel: Whatever. What seems to be the problem? Flam Mingo: That is our problem, well, actually, one of several thousand little pests. Jeff: Hey, get your wings off me, you long legged toikey base-tahs! Zidgel: We're Federation officers here to help you, my lawn ornament friends. Jeff: Sure, sure. And what's your story, small fry? Jason: Who, me? Uh, I'm Jason, and this is my sister Michelle. We're with them. Jeff: Yeah, well I don't like the looks of them. Birds of a feather, know what I mean? Jeff: I'll plead my case to the kids. Fidgel: Regulation permits the selection of an arbiter, providing there are no linguistical or dialectical difficulties. Jeff: Aw, thanks, Einstein. He always talk like that? Jeff: So, kid, name's Nutty McFlufflypants. Call me Jeff...please. Alright, this is it, pure and simple. They stole our water, and we want it back! Flam Mingo: That's a blatant fabrication! We had an agreement! Now you pot bellied hooligans have threatened to attack us and go back on the deal! Jeff: Who you calling a hooligan, bird legs? Zidgel: Excuse me, but did you say attack? Jeff: You bet your beak. In fact, the signal's been given, and my boys should be on their way, right about now. Jeff: Hand over the water if you know what's good for yous. Flam Mingo: I told you, now do something or we will! Jeff: We want our water! Flam Mingo and Jeff: Well?! Flam Mingo and Jeff: Well?! Jason: How about you share? Flam Mingo and Jeff: Never! Never! Never! Never! Fidgel: The procedural directives of a class 4 planetary operation specifically requires a review of the history which preceded said disputes. Midgel: He means before you launch a war, why don't you tell us how it started? Flam Mingo: Oh. It all started several years ago. Oh yes, things were very different back then. In those days was very little water. We barely survived from day to day. While over there, the gnomes lived in a lap of luxery. Theirs was a land full and lush with vegetation, trees, food, but most of all, water. They had a pond, and with all they had, would they help us, would they share? No. But one day, it all changed. A metal man saw our plight and he helped us. It was through his clever genius that everything was turned around, creating this, the happy land we have here today. Jeff: Happy land?! You stole all the water! Kevin: Stealing's naughty. Flam Mingo: You had your turn, now it's ours! Kevin: Sharing's nice. Jeff: Why, you no good, bandy legged, beanpole, you stole our pond! Kevin: Ooh, name calling isn't very-- Flam Mingo: Never! We only tapped into the water below with the pump from Cavitus. Midgel: Wait a minute, did you say Cavitus? Baron Cavitus? Zidgel: Oh, he's gonna get it now. It's one big fat time out for him, boy. You watch and see. Jason: Cavitus was here? Midgel: Gentlemen, you've been had. No time to waste. Take us to the hose. Cavitus: (evil laughter) Perfect. Perfect! The penguins have wandered into my little conflict. Soon the fires of war will be lit, and Planet Sharalike will be mine. (evil laughter) And it's not even my birthday. Minion #1: But, master, won't the penguins help them and stop the war? Cavitus: Not so. Watch, and learn. Cavitus: (sighs) On second thought, just watch. Jeff: Alright, Mr. Federation Guy, here's the hose. Now what? Cavitus: (evil laughter) Watch this. Jason: We're in trouble. Michelle: You think? Jeff: What did you do?! Flam Mingo: Yes, what have you done?! Zidgel: I, I, I, I, I, I, I. I don't know. Jeff: Turn it back on! Cavitus: (laughs) The look on his face! This is too good! Bert: (laughs) Woah! Whew. Fidgel: It must be Cavitus. He shut off the water. Midgel: Some kind of remote signal. There must be a pump somewhere out there. Fidge, give me your spectometer. Fidgel: What for? Midgel: I wanna try something. Fidgel: No, you'll break it. Midgel: What? Michelle: Can't he borrow it for a moment? He might be able to get us free. Fidgel: No, he's never careful with my things. It's a delicate device. Michelle: But, doctor, what about Sol's cookie? What about sharing? Fidgel: Well, what do you want it for, anyway? Midgel: I need to get back to the ship to get a fix on the pump so you can find it, override the signal, and turn it back on. Michelle: Please? This is no time to be stingy. Fidgel: Don't get any sand in it. Midgel: Thank you. I'll head to the ship. You look around here, keep your communicator on. Zidgel: Now, I realize how this all must appear, but I assure you that despite my hardy physique, I'm really not strong enough to break your water hose. Midgel: Right, let's see what's what. There we are. Round and around around we go, and gotcha. Fidgel, do you read? Come in. Fidgel: Well, it's about time. They've got the captain trussed up like a Christmas package. Midgel: That's not good, I mean, unless it actually was Christmas. Alright, listen, I got the pump coordinates. Stand by. Zidgel: Uh, did I mention I was here on a peaceful mission? Midgel: Fidgel, come in. Fidgel: Right, I'm here. Hmm, the pump has a metal casing. And from the looks of it, I'm going to (toolbox drops) need some tools, yes, uh, thank you. Midgel: Just get that pump working. Minion #1: Master, there is still no fighting. Where is the war? Cavitus: Patience, patience! They're getting ready for war. These things take time. The Planet Sharalike is just within our grasp. With all of its vast resourses, add to that the end of the penguins, a price well worth waiting for, wouldn't you say? Bert: (sighs) Why do I bother? Michelle: Zidgel, what are we gonna do? Zidgel: Well, we're not gonna panic, okay? Now if I can just, just-- Michelle: You want us to help you? Zidgel: No, just look natural. I've almost--nearly there--just--one more. Michelle: Oh, how did we even get into this? How are we supposed to fix this problem? Jason: Well, if those selfish birds would just share their water, there wouldn't even be a problem. Kevin: Selfish is bad, sharing's good. Michelle: Wait a minute, why should they? The gnomes started it. They wouldn't share their water when they had it. Jason: Oh, that's great. The cupcake queen has spoken. And since Zidgel shut off the water, nobody has it. Zidgel: I didn't shut off the water! Why does everyone keep saying that?! I was standing there just like you! I didn't do anything! Michelle: I thought you said we shouldn't panic. Kevin: I'm bored. Zidgel: Yeah, well-- Kevin: Hello! Fidgel: Kevin, is that you? We've been trying to raise you and the captain. Eh, I'm trying to open the control panel, so I can boost the transverse override and operate the pump manually. Hello? Kevin? Kevin: Hello! Fidgel: Kevin, is the captain there? Kevin: Uh, a bit tied up. Zidgel: Fidgel, I'm here! You found the pump. Any idea what shut it off? Fidgel: I'll give you one guess. Zidgel: Well, it wasn't me, I can tell you that. Was it? Fidgel: The dark lord Cavitus. Zidgel: Cavitus! Drat, I was gonna say that. Okay, ask me another one. Fidgel: Are Jason and Michelle there? Zidgel: Yes. Aw, come on, that's too easy. I want a hard one. Fidgel: Midgel is on his way to rescue you. I'll join you just as soon as I can. Fidgel out. Midgel: Captain, I got your positions. Prepare to transport. Zidgel: Woah! Fidgel: Oh! Fidgel: Eureka! Cavitus: Congratulations, you've restored the water. How heroic. And now, thanks to you, I've thought of a much better plan. A way to destroy both meddlesome civilizations all at once and get rid of you as well. It's perfect, really. Thank you. Zidgel: What's the status of the pipeline, Midge? Is the water back on yet? Midgel: Scanning, affirmative, water's flowing. Zidgel: Terrific! Way to go, Fidgel! Fidgel? Midgel: His com link is off. That's not like him, sir. Jason: What's going on? Zidgel: Fidgel got the water back on! Isn't it great? Michelle: What about the war? Zidgel: What war? Jason: Over the water. Zidgel: Oh yeah, that's still a problem, isn't it? Midgel: Uh, sir, I found Fidgel, and it looks like the problem's gotten a lot bigger. Zidgel: Great scott! That hose is gonna blow and wipe out everything! Michelle: What do we do? Jason: We've got to think of something! Zidgel: (grunts) I've got nothing. Michelle: "And he that waters shall be watered also himself." Kevin: I'm it. Michelle: I've got an idea! May I borrow this, Kevin? Kevin: You want me to share? Michelle: That's the answer, isn't it? Sharing. Michelle: Jason, I'm sorry about the cupcakes. I was wrong not to share, but now I need your help if we're going to save Fidgel. Jason: Okay, I'm in. Flam Mingo: What do you want? Haven't you done enough harm? Midgel: Just stand back. Fidgel? Fidgel: Midgel, is that you? Midgel: How do I turn the plazer beam into a laser? Fidgel: Well, if you take out the filter and boost the maximum frequency, the light will become a laser, but the beam will still be self refracting. It won't fire straight. Midgel: That's fine. Just hold on. Midgel: Ready, Michelle? Michelle: Ready! Michelle: Yeah! Jason: Wow! Michelle: You see? When you're generous with what you have, everybody benefits. Fidgel: Well, don't just stand there. Untape me. Fidgel: Owwwwww! Minion #1: Ooh, look at the pretty green planet! Cavitus: I'll get you, penguins! Michelle: Have a bite, Miss Pretty Pretty. Grandmum and I made them ourselves. Grandmum: Oh, hello, pumpkin. I hope you've had time to think about sharing. Michelle: I have, Grandmum. Grandmum: Would you like to hear what the good book says about it? "The generous soul shall be blessed" Michelle: "And he that waters shall be watered himself." Grandmum: Oh, why, that's right! Very good, young lady. You have learned something. Michelle: Yes, Grandmum. I learned when you're stingy, it makes for a disaster. It's better to be generous and share what you have with others. See? I'm even sharing with Jason. Jason: If I have to attend her party, I have to dress for it. Anything for a cupcake. Michelle: Dear God, thank you for the cupcakes, but mostly for good friends and family to share them with. Jason: And thanks for Grandmum who's an interesting baker, and for a sister who's generous. Jason and Michelle: Amen. Category:Transcripts Category:3-2-1 Penguins! transcripts Category:Finished Transcripts